We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
