One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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