In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
