Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Randomize
