I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
