I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
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