I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize