I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
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