the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
So apparently I’m into choking now
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