Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
