Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
