the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
someone owes me an orgasm
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
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