she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
