Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Randomize