shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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