how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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