why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
