Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
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