How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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