I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
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