Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
