Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
