Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Randomize
