So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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