I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
