I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
