Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
