Define "chronic" masturbator.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
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