if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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