Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize