Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
so let's talk penis.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
