i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
