LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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