you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
