You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
There's always time for handjobs
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
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