I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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