Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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