I'm going to jail i love you
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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