If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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