i was born a porn star she said
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Sorry about my life...
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
