I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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