You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
