haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Never underestimate the power of titties
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
