I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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