awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
