2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize