its not stalking. its research.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
