he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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