hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
