I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
